幽默英语故事演讲稿大全（精选3篇）
老板最大
There was a guy who went into a shop to buy a parrot. There werethree parrots in the shop. One was $5,000; another one, $10,000; and the third one, $30,000.
The customer asked the owner, “How come this guy is $5,000? That‟s so expensive for this kindof parrot.”
The owner said, “Because I have trained him and he can talk.”
So the customer asked him, “How about this guy? What can he do that makes him so expensive?”
The owner said, “Well, apart from talking, he can also do some amusing actions,like dancing and so on. That‟s why he‟s so expensive.”
Then the customer said, “How about the third one? What canhe do that makes him so expensive?”
The owner of the shopsaid, “I don‟t know. Normally, I have never heard him talk, nor dance, nor whistle, nor sing, nothing at all! But the other two call him „The Boss.‟”
有个人到一间商店买鹦鹉。店里有三只鹦鹉，其中一只卖五千元，另一只卖一万元，还有一只卖三万元。
顾客问老板：「为什么这只要卖五千元?这个价钱对这种鹦鹉来说太贵了!」
老板说：「因为我有训练他讲话。」
顾客又问：「那这只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」
老板说：「他除了会说话之外，还会表演一些有趣的动作，好比说跳舞等等，所以才卖这么贵。」
顾客接着又问：「那第三只呢?他会做什么?为什么要卖这么贵?」
老板说：「我不知道。我从没听过他讲话、吹口哨或唱歌，也没看过他跳舞，什么都没有!不过另外两只叫他：『老板!』
A little kid fell in love with another little kid, a school mate. Sometimes the kids think they fall in love when they have a crush on someone else in the class, when they‟re eight or ten years old or something like that. So the eight-year-oldkid came back home and asked his father, “Father, is it expensive to be married?” And the father said, “Yes, son, it is very expensive.” So the son asked, “How much does it cost?” And the father said, “I don‟t know, son. I‟m still paying.”
有个小孩爱上了另一个小孩，对方是学校的同学。八岁或十岁左右的孩子有时会迷恋班上某个人，然后就以为自己恋爱了。因此这个八岁的小孩回家问他爸爸：「爸爸，结婚很花钱吗?」爸爸说：「是啊，儿子，非常花钱。」儿子又问：「要花多少钱呢?」爸爸说：「我不知道，儿子，我到现在还一直在付钱啊!」
牧童和狼
A Shepherd-boy, who tended his flock not far from a village, used to amuse himself at times in crying out"wolf !wolf!"Twice or thrice his trick succeeded .The whole village came running out to his assistance when all the return they got was to be laughed at for their pains .At last one day the wolf came indeed .The boy cried out in earnest. But his neighbors, supposing him to be at his old sport, paid no heed to his cries, and the wolf devoured the sheep. So the boy learned, when it was too late, that liars are not believed even when they tell the truth.
一个放羊的孩子在离村子不远的地方放羊。他为了开心寻乐常喊："狼来了!狼来了!"他的恶作剧有两三次达到了目的。全村的人都跑来帮忙，而他们所得到的回报却是一顿嘲笑，白费了心力。最后，有一天狼真的来了。这个孩子认真地大喊起来。但是他的邻人们却以为他又在耍把戏，谁都不理会他的喊叫，于是狼把羊吃了。因此这牧童得到了教训：爱说谎的人，甚至在他说真话的时候，也没人相信他，但是他知道得太晚了。